Death of a Showboat

One day I was walking through a cemetery when I saw a gruesome yet odd sight. I wish I had a camera because this picture would have been worth certainly been worth more than a thousand words. I will try my best to create the image with words alone, and we will see where it goes.

It was a beautiful autumn morning in New England when I decided to visit my grandmother at her grave site. On my way I was taking in the site of the various different mausoleums and head stones. I noticed an old, rustic looking cherry tree beside a very tall monument. The tree was basically bare aside from my discovery. A dead squirrel hung between the fork in two branches. It was apparent that he had gotten himself in a deadly predicament that had caused his demise. I quickly assumed that he must have mistimed a jump and got lodged I'm the branch and broke his neck. Or, perhaps he had gotten stuck while chasing prey and hung himself when he could not get out. It is impossible to know for sure what had happened, but he had certainly messed up big time.

As I sat and observed this ugly freak accident, I began to reflect. I recalled the countless episodes in my life when I had seen squirrels perform the most death-defying feats without blinking an eye. I have seen these creatures do things that would put any human acrobat to Shame. They run across telephone wires, prance across treetops, and are fast as lightning. Therefore, to see this sight completely baffled me. However, it made me realize something very important.

No matter how amazing someone or something is, we all make mistakes. Everybody can be hurt, we are all mortal. Sometimes people get big heads and they purchase million dollar cars and homes just to show boat. They think that they can hide behind their check books. Or maybe a body builder likes to show boat by wearing a tight shirt. I attribute this correlation to the squirrel who flys through the air like a tiny ninja. So many times I have admired the beauty of their tactics, and the ease in which they can stride. 

But, we must always remain humble. Because the moment, that nanosecond in time when we believe we are larger than life....we get blasted back to reality. We will all die. It is the cost of life. Show boating might make you feel superior to others, but nobody will be any better than anybody else....nor any worse.

Time

I am fascinated by the concept of time. It is in control of almost every single facet of our existence. We mold our lives around our need to be in certain places at certain times. We put almost all of our concern into an intangible and in adamant concept. However, if time cannot be seen, how do we know it truly exists at all? 

We have all reflected on our pasts and wondered about the future. And yet, all we know for sure is this exact moment. Be in the moment and feel it. Every moment

Beauty

Because all people are different, they often define vague terms and concepts differently. In my mind, "Beauty" is a loosely thrown about term, as it should be, there is a lot of beauty to be seen on this planet. For instance, a brand new ferrari, New England in September, or the girl next door. However, the most overlooked form of beauty that exists within our realm cannot be seen at all. It is an intangible form of beauty which is far more electrifying that skin deep. The inner beauty of certain individuals hold far more glimmer and prestige than anything else. The true content of ones character can be the most beautiful or the most disgusting thing in the world. 

When I look at a cute baby or a colorful flower, those are simply works of god. They are simply created as such. But an enhanced soul is incomparable. When a person touches your heart with true and unconditional kindness, it creates something else entirely. Getting to know strangers often reveals dirty secrets. However, it is also the only way to find the most beautiful of things.

The Realview Mirror

Over lives are filled with all of the nonsense around us everyday  only because they set up those “special moments”. Every now and then we face an obstacle that will define our very soul. And it is only those small moments that mean anything and everything at all. Will you be a coward or will you fight? Will you turn a blind eye or will you speak up? Will you face the music or will you run?

Almost every religion ever created has placed a large emphasis on “sacrifice”. That is because actions will and have always spoken much louder than words. Our actions are what define our soul. And once our bodies are no longer able to operate adequately enough to provide our bodies with life, it is all we are left with. Did you do the right thing? Or did you do what was wrong, or just easier?

We will all be one day observing our presence on this earth for eternity through the rearview mirror. In the big scheme of things, our windshield will only protect us from the insects for so long. "The small things are much larger than they appear"

Luka Hocevar

     I spent the majority of my childhood playing basketball at the parks. It had started because there was simply nothing else to do. But over the years, I had become obsessed with perfecting my skills and becoming the best player possible. If I had gone a day without playing, I would feel like I had cheated myself. When I was young I had heard a quote that went something like this; “Always practice and give it 100%, because somebody some place is working harder than you are. And when you face them one-on-one, they will beat you”. I had always taken this quote straight to the heart. So in the snow, I carried a shovel to the park. And after it would rain, I would sweep away the puddles. At night time, I went to a different park that had lights. There were no such things as days off. During high school I also spent a ton of time at the YMCA playing against premier collegiate competition. My game had really developed, so there were days when I would dominate the best players around. These experiences would boost my confidence and push me to work even harder. I began to lift weights on a regular basis and develop my upper-body strength. I had purchased these "jump-soles" to assist in my training. They strapped onto my sneakers and were designed to work the muscles in your legs that make you jump higher. I trained with them and ankle weights together, determined to give myself the ability to jump higher. I had spent years and years perfecting my outside shot. I believed that I had done everything I could have done to become the best basketball player possible. But, as I got older I began to accept the fact that my work ethic alone could only take me so far. I realized that the only way I was going to get recruited by a major college was if I was 7 feet tall or African-American. After all of my years of training and spending nearly all of my childhood playing basketball, I had felt like a failure. I had a decent high school basketball career but I never got recruited by any notable schools. 

     I ended up attending community college and planned on playing for the team there. It was during my time here that I met a basketball player named Luka Hocevar. He was a few inches shorter than me and I believe he was from Slovenia. While spending time around Luka, I learned a very humbling lesson. I had always thought that I had pushed myself to become the best possible player, but boy was I wrong. This guy had the work ethic of some kind of super hero. He basically lived in the gym. If he wasn't playing basketball, he was lifting weights. But it wasn't just the fact that he trained so often, it was the level at which he pushed himself at all times. This was division 3 junior college basketball, but this guy worked like he was training for the fricken Olympics every single day. I have no idea what pushed him or where he got all of his energy to always keep going, but it was absolutely remarkable. Witnessing him always in the gym and watching the way he trained made me realize that I could have done so much more than I ever actually did. I had always felt like I pushed myself to become the best, but Luka showed me that I was completely wrong. He never touted about his work ethic, but as they say; "Actions speak louder than words". Watching him made me realize that the reason I never became a division 1 basketball player was only because I didn't work hard enough. I thought that I wanted it more than anything in the world, but I guess I didn't. I could have done so much more and worked so much harder if I really wanted it bad enough. I realized that I didn't know the true meaning of "hard work" until I met Luka. 

      I couldn't tell you what pushed him, but I assume that it was his hunger to be the best. He didn't take any short cuts, the guy would hit the bench press hours before a game. He wasn't somebody who was blessed with god-given talent, he earned it on his own. He was stronger, faster, and could jump higher than everybody else because of one reason: he wanted it the most.

      I didn't go watch any of the games because it was too painful to watch the games when you know you should be playing. However, I did go to one game. Our team was down by 2 points with only 3 seconds remaining. Our team had to go the length of the floor so they passed it in to half court and called a time out. We all knew that the coach was drawing up a play for Luka, he deserved the shot. They passed it in to him as he brushed off a tight screen, caught the pass, and elevated over everybody. And as he let it fly with perfect form from just inside of half court the buzzer sounded while everybody in the gym held their breath. As soon as the ball went through the net, the crowd erupted. Everybody in the gym was completely stunned. Everybody that is, except Luka, 

      

       

The Last Place

"I found exactly what I have been searching for in the last place I thought to look".

As we flutter through our days falling aimless like a maple seed, alive in the breeze. We tediously attempt to plot our ideal landing spot. However, we do not know what it looks like, and we cannot control which direction the wind might choose to blow us. If we do not know what it is we are seeking, how can we ever expect to find it?

I have often heard the phrase; "I found it in the last place I thought to look". A bit of an oxymoron wouldn't you say? Certainly if we had already found it we would have stopped searching long ago. Therefore, we should always find what we are seeking in the last place we look. Otherwise, we will always remain that falling seed, forever spinning our flaps into an abyss. We will live a life with no purpose.

We travel the world trying to find ourselves. We frantically tear apart the sofa cushions trying to find our keys. And we look to others for answers that only exist within ourselves.

But every once in a while, we find exactly what we are looking for, and it is right under our nose.

Perfect Pitch-Fork

     I have been writing, recording, and producing alternative hip-hop music since the end of 1999. My friend Kong was the one who had originally got me interested in it. He has always loved to sing and has a great voice for it. Ever since we were little, we would always rap and sing songs together. I remember in the summers during elementary school he would stay at my house sometimes for 3-4 days at a time. At night we would sometimes write and sing funny songs. We still remember most of them still to this day. As we got older we would usually get together and have a few drinks and sing songs. He has always done an amazing rendition of "Sukiyaki", so people would egg him on to sing it.
     One day he was messing around with Microsoft windows "sound recorder". We recorded ourselves singing and rapping some old songs we had written when we were in elementary school. It was just something we had fooled around with a couple times when we were bored and drinking.
However, as the years passed I began to get really involved in it. Kong had downloaded some professional music recording software on my computer and I had began writing songs. I was not very educated at using the software to produce any professional grade songs, but it didn't stop me from trying. Over the years I became more and more involved in it. The song writing aspect of it has always been my forte, and the more and more I worked at it I eventually became pretty good.
     Anyways, In the summer of 2003 I was living with my brother Ian in the apartment below my mothers house. She hated hearing the music all the time, but she learned to accept it after a while.
This one night I was at home hanging out with Kong, we were having a few beers and working on a song. My brother was out of town working for the weekend so we had the place to ourselves. I remember that the song we were working on was coming along beautifully when a knock came at the door. It was Ian's friend Larry.
     Ian and Larry had been close friends ever since they were very young. I explained to him that Ian was out of town and that Kong and I were busy working on a song. He asked if we would mind if he hung out for a little while. A few years before he had moved out into the boondocks of Pennsylvania with his mother. Occassionally on the weekends he would come into town to hang out with friends and go out to the bars. Larry said that he wouldn't bother us and that he wasn't planning on staying long. He said that he was planning on going out to the bars and just needed a place to "pre-game". I told him it was fine as long as he didn't bother us. We were in the process of recording, so it was very important that we have silence so that any background noises didn't ruin our song. He had kept to his word and everything was going fine.
    About a half hour later, another one of Ian's friends; Ron had showed up. Ron had a tendency of being a jerk. He is one of those guys who is cool, but once he gets drunk he likes to start fights with people. I told him that Ian is not home and that we were busy. He noticed that Larry was there and he started talking to him. They made plans to go out to the bar together in a little while. Somehow, Ron convinced me to let him in too since they would be leaving soon. I told them that they had to hang out in the kitchen because Kong and I were recording in the living room. They ended up drinking a few beers and getting loud. I told them that they have to leave. They finished their beers and left for the bars.
     Kong and I continued to work on our song for another few hours. We were just about finished with the song when Larry and Ron returned. I told them that they "cannot hang out here". But they pleaded with me, and promised that they would just hang out in the kitchen and be quiet. I told them that I didn't care, I didn't want them there. But they just wouldn't leave and they kept pleading with me. So eventually, I again caved in. But I told them, if they are loud at all I am going to kick them out.
     It didn't take long before I could hear Ron and Larry arguing in the kitchen. I didn't know what they were arguing about at first, but it escalated quickly. I went into the kitchen and told them to "get out of my house now". Ron was drunk and very upset at Larry. I found out that apparently, Larry had marijuana and Ron was mad that Larry would not share with him. He called Larry; "A selfish piece if shit" and told him that he would "beat his ass". I told them that I don't care about any of that and that I just want them both to leave now! But Ron wasn't even listening to me, he was just arguing with Larry still and trying to start a fight with him. I started to get very angry and threatened to call the police.
     Finally, Ron exploded verbally. He said; "Fuck you Larry, you're a fucking faggot. You're lucky I don't fuck you up". Then, as he was heading out the door he stopped to address Kong and I. "And fuck you too Dan, and you too Kong! You guys are fucking pussies. I'll fuck you guys up too"! Then he walked out the door and slammed it behind him.
     Now, up to this point I had been calm about the whole situation. I knew they were taking advantage of me by using my house as a place to drink, but I had let it go. However, after Ron had threatened Kong and I for absolutely no reason, my blood began to boil. I couldn't believe what had just happened. I looked at Kong and I said; "Did he just call us pussies and say he would fuck us up"?! Kong looked really worked up and he goes "Yea what the fuck"!?
    I said "Fuck that", and I jumped up absolutely infuriated. I hurried out the door, and for some reason I grabbed a broom that was leaning up against the wall on my way out. When I got out front of the house I seen Ron, he was about half way up the street. Suddenly, I seen one of the funniest things I have ever seen in my entire life. I see Kong go jogging past me holding a pitchfork in his hand, and he hollers; "Hey Ron, come here! I gotta tell you something"!
    
     On the back porch of my apartment, there was a whole bunch of old farming tools for some reason. There was a few old shovels, rakes, hoes, and a pitchfork. Apparently, Kong had seen me grab the broom and so he went and grabbed the first thing he could find. To this day I couldn't tell you why I grabbed the broom. I think it was just because I was so pissed off at the whole situation. First of all, I told them that I didn't want them there numerous times. Secondly, they promised to be quiet and that they wouldn't bother us. But the final straw, was when he threatened my friend and I for absolutely no reason. I was so angry that I was shaking.

     Anyways, Ron stopped and faced us when he seen us coming towards him. He says; "What are you pussies gonna do? Is that broom, Dan? HAHA, you don't have the balls to hit me with that". The moment he said that I cocked it back and blasted him across the face with it as hard as I possibly could. He immediately went down onto one knee holding his face. "Ahhhhhhhh" he yelped. "You're going to fucking jail man! I can't believe you just did that!" he hollered fearfully with tears in his eyes. This seemed to just infuriate me more. I went towards him "You want me to hit you again?!"I said. He screeched; "Nooooo" and then scurried away quickly.
     I turned and started walking back towards my house, I couldn't believe what I had just done. Kong goes; "Fuck Ron man, he totally deserved that shit". As we were walking back towards the house I seen Larry. He had come outside and apparently witnessed the whole thing. He goes; "Dude, that was the greatest thing I ever seen in my life". Needless to say, Larry never really cared for Ron. I said; "All we wanted to do was work on our music, why did you guys have to bother us?"

     Anyways, about a half hour later the cops showed up at my apartment.

Cops: Who hit the guy with the broom

Me: I hit him with the broom

Cops: Why?

Me: Because he threatened me and my friend. I told him I didn't want him here in the first place!

Cops: Well then why was he here?

Me: Because he wouldn't listen.

Cops: Is that why the fight started?

Me: No, the fight started because the two of them showed up uninvited. And then Ron wanted to fight Larry because he wouldn't smoke weed with him.

     The cops immediately attacked Larry and I could hear him hollering, "Why are you searching me? I didn't do anything"! They quickly locate the marijuana on him and place it on the table. Then they turn their attention back to me for the rest of the story.

Cops: So then why did you hit him with the Broom?

Me: Because he threatened my friend and I for no reason.....

Suddenly, we heard a loud commotion coming from the kitchen and the cops went running in. Larry had picked up the marijuana, ran to the bathroom, threw it in the toilet and flushed it. One of the cops grabbed it out of the toilet before it flushed and the other one grabbed Larry in a very tight choke hold. They carried Larry out of my apartment horizontally and took him jail. Kong and I were waiting for the cops to come back in...but for some reason they never did. We were absolutely astonished. After about a half hour had passed, we went back to work and finally finished our song.

It was such a crazy night. However, looking back on the incident I am very lucky and thankful. First of all, I am very lucky that I didn't get an assault charge on my record. But secondly, I am very happy that Kong didn't attack Ron with that pitchfork. He was certainly angry enough to have used it, but we're lucky he didn't. Things could have ended up far worse than they actually did. In the end I think that Kong was pretty shaken up by the incident. The "pitch" in his voice ended up being a little shaky on that song.



D Boone Productions
www.soundclick.com/dboone